February 11, 2026 The 30-Day Wise Vetting Plan (Time, Questions, Boundaries, and Peace)
“Whoever is careless with the truth in small matters cannot be trusted in important affairs.”
- Albert Einstein
Listen to, or read this meditation:
If you’ve ever been swept up in intensity, confused it for intimacy, and then had to untangle your heart later—welcome. You’re human.
But we’re not doing that anymore.
We’re choosing a pace that protects your peace and reveals the truth.
Because love that’s real doesn’t need you to rush.
It can handle time.
Having a plan helps
A wise vetting process isn’t about being cynical. It’s about being clear.
When you have a simple structure, you stop grading someone based on vibes and start observing based on patterns.
And patterns show up best when you don’t sprint.
Here is a good 30-day mindset
For the next month, your job isn’t to “lock it in.” Your job is to watch:
consistency,
honesty,
emotional steadiness,
and how you feel after interactions.
Not “butterflies.” Not adrenaline. I mean: calm.
Calm is not boring. Calm is your body saying, “This feels safe.”
Your pace is part of your standard
A mature man won’t punish you for having boundaries. He won’t rush you to silence your discernment. He won’t act like your “no” is an obstacle to overcome.
If he does, that’s not romance. That’s pressure.
Three questions that reveal a lot
You don’t need a detective board on your wall. You just need a few calm, grown-up questions that expose values:
“What does a healthy relationship look like to you—day to day?”
“How do you handle conflict and repair?”
“What are you currently working on in your own life?”
Listen for responsibility. Listen for humility. Listen for substance. And most importantly—watch if his life matches his mouth.
A simple 30-day clarity check
At the end of 30 days, ask:
Do I feel calmer with him—or more anxious?
Are my standards being met—or negotiated down?
Am I becoming more like myself—or less?
The right man doesn’t shrink you. He steadies you. He doesn’t make you prove your worth. He shows you he’s worthy of your trust.
Click Below and Download the one-page worksheet: 30-Day Wise Vetting Worksheet. It will help you evaluate the man you’re dating.
30 Day Wise Vetting Worksheet Detroit Body Mind Soul.pdf
© 2026 Detroit Flanagan
All rights reserved
